Dating a virgin

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It’s true I always had a crush on one (or two) boys and had my fair share of boyfriends, but no relationship ever got serious enough where sex was even a thought, let alone a deal breaker.For most of my junior high and high school years, I played the role of the friend — the token girl in a group of boys who were more interested in taking my advice for how to ask a girl to prom than taking me to prom.The most serious contender waited until I was so smitten with him that I would break plans, skip class, call in sick — whatever — to drive hours to visit him, and then dumped me, saying it “just wasn’t a good time for him.”Another reason sex didn’t factor into my coming-of-age years is that I’m a Christian.Not a Bible-thumping, the-world-is-going-to-hell-in-a-handbasket Christian, but a (sexually) conservative, Bible-believing, traditionally raised Minnesota Lutheran girl who was taught that sex is for marriage and that’s that.Basically, what was once just another bit of my identity has, over 26 years, become a defining element of who I am, whether I like it or not. (At least when it’s good.) I cannot wait to have sex someday.

In the end I offered to give him the number to my gynecologist, surely he’d believe her, right? Anyway, that’s when I became completely comfortable with being by myself. See, when I was fifteen years old I made a vow to God that I would remain a virgin until I was married. The rest of my week consisted of many phone calls and text messages from Mr. ” Okay, you get the point, I was anything but nice. I am a Christian woman and with that being said, whenever I do anything I always ask God for guidance. When I had prayed about this particular guy, I felt in my spirit that God wanted me to go ahead and tell him about my vow before things got really serious with us.Some play it cool while calculating how to coerce me into changing my mind.(This usually involves the showing off of foreplay moves, tales of the extreme pleasures I’ve been missing and/or purring that they don’t mind waiting — unless it’s going to be, like, two years, in which case they’re not so sure.) Some bail immediately.

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